A Space to Remember

Someday I will write about what it means to ‘hold space’ for someone. Someone you love. Someone you don’t quite understand. Someone you know only as a “stranger”. Someone you do not know but love. Someone you do not know and hate.

Today, however, all I want to do with this space is Remember.

Remember Lori Kaye, z”l. She put herself

Who stepped in front of her Rabbi, Rabbi Goldstein, when a lost gunman took his shot. I don’t know Lori. From the words I’ve gathered, she was the light and energy of her Shul. Known for committing mitzvahs (good deeds) and giving tzedaka (charity). Deeds that came natural to her. She was known as a Eshet Chayil, a Woman of Valor.

I remember Lori Kaye as a Woman of Valor.

Today this space is for 8 year old Noya Dahan and her uncle Along Peretz. A gunman injured them during his attack on the Chabad of Poway.

Today this space is for all of the Chabad of Poway congregents. Those who suffered by being present and those who suffer in the wake of this tragedy.

I grew up in the Temple Adat Shalom Synagogue just down the street. I experienced the invaluable gift that is belonging. Belonging to a community. Belonging to a place of worship. Belonging to yourself.

Today this space is for all of the Jewish communities. Hold each other close.

Tragedy, it’s maddening darkness, breaks open. It takes time. It takes grief. But it does break. And the light of those we lost pours out. Powerful and warm and there for you. For us. To help us find a way to hold space for hate and fear (in a way that won’t define or dissolve you).

Today I light a candle for remembrance and burn incense for breath.


Keep breathing, babies. You are so loved.


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